The Messenger (peace be upon him) said: “A woman is married for four things, i.e., her wealth, her family status, her beauty, and her religion. So you should marry the religious woman (otherwise) you will be a loser." [Reported by Al Bukhari].
Marital life is not an experimental field; therefore a man is not blamed if he takes a long time to search for his partner: the mother of his children and the fort of his home.
If we think deeply in the marital problems today, we shall find that most of them are a result of haste in choosing a wife without search, careful choice, and correct basis of selection.
Some people hold beauty as a basis for their choices and some people search for money or social status, lineage, or ranks.
Homes that are built on economic bases, personal interests, or superficial features will soon collapse and end.
The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) mentioned the things that a man likes in a woman and specified four things: money, social status, beauty and religion.
Furthermore, he exhorted Muslims to choose women based on religion which is confirmed by reality where many families, which gave much care to this side, are now enjoying stability and happy life. On the other hand, some families are troubled by seditions and disputes because they have neglected religion when they started establishing their families.
The Prophet's exhortation to religion to be the basis of choice does not mean that he ignores the human disposition which is pleased by beauty.
Al Ghazaly (may Allah bestow mercy on his soul) said: The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: (A woman is neither married for her beauty because her it may kill her nor for her money because it may make her haughty, but marry women for their religion.)
The Prophet (peace be upon him) exaggerated in urging a Muslim to choose a wife based on her religion because such a woman will be a good help for her husband unlike the irreligious wife, who will distract her husband from religion.
Until he (Al Ghazaly) said: Exhortation to choose a wife based on her religion not her beauty does not mean to overlook beauty, but it is a warning to choose a woman only for her beauty because marrying for beauty only exhorts to marriage and neglect religion. (1)
Dear brother, be keen to choose a righteous girl because she will be a pious wife and a kind mother who will protect one's honor and bring up good children, who will please you in your lifetime as well as after your death.
(1) Ihya' Ulum Al Din of Al Ghazaly, book of proprieties of marriage.
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